Straightjacket Feeling ch. 2

Dean checked his mirror as well and stopped the car. The road was empty so he didn’t worry about traffic. He turned and looked out the back window. Sure enough, Sam was right. Abbi was no where to be found. He pulled over and got out of the car without even turning it off. Sam turned off the car and took the keys, getting out as well. Dean ran down the road to the last place they had seem Abbi. “ABBI,” he screamed. Sam could hear the worry in his voice. Dean’s heart was racing along with his mind. He had no idea where she went. He was beginning to worry she wasn’t even real. “Abbi,” he shouted again.

“Dean,” Sam shouted from down the hill. Dean ran to the edge of the hill. At the bottom was Sam standing over a body.

“Abbi,” he screamed as he ran down the hill. As soon as he got to her he knelt down and picked her up in his arms. Her skin was cold and deathly pale. “Wake up,” he whispered. “Wake up,” he said again. His voice was shaking. Sam could hear it. He tried to think of something to do but his mind was at a loss. Dean pulled Abbi close to him and rocked back and forth. “Wake up,” he said again. Sam tried desperately to figure out what might have happened to her. Dean picked her up and headed up the hill. Sam followed close behind him.

“She needs to get to a hospital.”

“I know Sam,” he shouted. He looked down at Abbi’s pale limp body. “Hold on,” he whispered to her. He set her gently in the back seat of the car. Once both the boys were in the car Dean tore down the road.

“Dean the next town’s not for another hour.”

“I know Sam,” he yelled through gritted teeth as he drove faster down the empty road. Finally, they got to a hospital. He ran into the emergency room carrying her. The doctors took her and told Dean and Sam to wait there.

Sam sat there and stared into space. Dean paced back and forth in front of Sam. Sam never saw Dean like this before. After a few more hours, Sam had fallen asleep, the doctor came out. Dean walked up to him. There was a somber look on his face. Dean paled as he walked up to the doctor. Sam woke slowly and watched without moving. He didn’t want Dean to have to go through what he was going through. The doctor walked away after a moment and Dean walked back to Sam. His face was stolid. Sam stood to look his brother in the eye. “Dean?” He didn’t say anything for a long time. Sam began to get worried. Dean fell into the chair and ran his hand though his hair. “Dean,” Sam said once more as he sat down next to his older brother. “What is it? Is she all right?”

“She’s dying,” he said quietly. His voice was empty, like he had died.

“What?” Sam paused and looked at the pain in his brother’s eyes. “Dean, this isn’t your fault. We’ll find whatever did this to her just like we’ll find what killed mom and Jess.”

“It’s not that simple Sam,” he snapped turning his head towards his brother. “We can’t find what did this to her because nothing did.” Sam’s look of worry turned to confusion. “She has Leukemia,” he said quietly. Sam hadn’t been ready for that. All of the tragedy in the Winchester boys’ lives had come from something otherworldly. This was different. He looked over at his brother again.

Dean was lost. Sam could see it in his eyes. Demons, monster, ghosts, spirits, anything like that Dean could handle but this was beyond Dean’s control. Dean hated not having some form of control over a situation. That is what had angered him so much with the shape-shifter. This though, was completely out of Dean’s hands. “I… I don’t know what to say Dean,” Sam said quietly. “I’m sorry.”

“Let’s go,” he said getting up and putting his jacket on. “We still have to find Dad.”

Sam stood as well but he didn’t move to leave. “Dean,” he said sternly. “That’s not fair to her. She needs someone right now and you’re just going to walk away from her?”

Dean turned back to Sam and looked him dead in the eyes. “She didn’t need me before she doesn’t need me now. Let’s go Sam.”

“No Dean,” Sam shouted. “This isn’t fair to her. You can’t just leave her alone like this. When she’s finds out-”

“She knows,” he shouted back at his brother. “What they did wasn’t fair to me.”



Nov. 2, 1983
Young Dean Winchester was fast asleep in his bedroom, tucked away safely under his blanket. He was torn suddenly from his dreams by a scream. He got up quickly and, almost instinctively, went to the window. Down in the back yard, looking up at him stood the small six year old figure of his closest friend. She had her arms wrapped around herself as if she were cold. It hadn’t begun to get that cold yet this year and Dean wondered why she looked so scared. He ran out of his room and stopped almost instantly when he saw the flames come from his baby brother’s room. He took a little step forward and peaked into the room. What he saw would haunt him for the rest of his life. He could barely make it out among the flames but it was definitely his mother. She was pinned to the ceiling with a look of pure horror on her pale face. The image was soon blocked out as his father came running out of the room. He handed Dean’s baby brother to him and told him to take Sammy and keep him safe. Dean nodded and ran out of the house to the backyard where Abbi stood. She stared at him, fear in her innocent eyes. Sammy began to cry but Dean didn’t notice. Within a few minutes Dean’s father came up and ran up behind him. “Abbi,” he said concerned. “What are you doing here?”

She continued to stare at Dean as if she didn’t hear his father. Then after a moment her head slowly raised, starting with her eyes. “I didn’t want Dean to get scared,” she said in her quiet voice. John Winchester looked at Abbi suspiciously. It was a judgment that would never change in the coming years. Abbi slowly looked down and met Dean’s eyes once more. The children that were Dean Winchester and Abbi Murphy died that night. No matter how immature Dean may have become that was the night he lost his innocence, and he would never be the same.